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Archive for January, 2013

Photographer down!

AR1A4258aAn old and abandoned warehouse caught fire last night in Bridgeport.  There was no loss of life and the fire will have only improved the property, once the rubble is hauled away in dump trucks.  Despite these two details, the newspaper and morning TV shows were properly orgasmic over the shear size of the incident.  The city’s fire commish declared it the biggest fire in 7 years.  From this, my takeaway was: they have a way of measuring the size of a fire?  Yes, apparently.  In this case, I think it mostly means a couple hundred dudes with access to fire trucks met up at the same time and place, and turned an old building into a crazy-looking ice sculpture.  This hasn’t happened in like, 7 years.

Like a dick, I showed up NOT wearing rubber boots, but fur-lined, slip-on loafers and blue jeans.  So, when I tried to gracefully leap a unleapable puddle of filth-flavored Slurpee, I ended up shin deep.  When I extricated my foot from the freezing, toxic quicksand, my shoe stayed submerged.  I took a full 7 seconds to finally determine that I had to retrieve the lost loafer.  In the 6 seconds before that, I seriously considered moving on.  Temperature check…14F.  The recovery was quick and eventful, and included me- wait for it…

…falling backward onto my ass.  Soaked feet, ass and cameras.

Ain’t that some bullshit.

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Mixed bag.

Today’s categories, in no particular order, are:

Unplanned fires, animal stories, sweet & savory, pro hockey, tiny little vehicles.

There was a fatal fire this morning in a high-rise condo on South Shore Drive.  Though I was too late to witness any of it, there was 30 minutes of high drama after the 7th floor blaze broke out.  Balcony rescues, jump bags, blown-out windows, extreme temps.  All the makings of a real-life nightmare.

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While en route to South Shore Drive, I saw the now locally famous hound that made his way onto the frozen Jackson Harbour, just two blocks from the fire.  An Animal Control officer from the city told me the beast had been cruising the ice for 3 hours.  3 hours.  On ice.  What a badass.  It’s like the honey badger of dogs.  What?  Frozen paws?  Black shepherd mix don’t give a shit.

Animal Control eventually popped him in the jugular with a dart, possibly saving his life.

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Ever see the movie: The Italian Job?  Me neither.

Apparently, one of the main characters in the film was a fleet of Mini Coopers.  If I’m understanding it correctly, the movie-makers utilized movie-making techniques to make the Mini Coopers look like cool cars.  More recently, Fiat made a commercial for its own Mini Cooper, employing Romanian model Catrinel Menghia in an effort to make the 500 look like a cool car.  fiat_girlBecause of that ad, I chose a Fiat 500 as my rental while my megawagon gets modifications.  I’m not entirely sure what I thought might happen once I took possession of the miniature car, but so far, I have not noticed anything in the operation of the machine that even remotely resembles Catrinel Menghia.  As you’d expect, I’m a little pissed about that.

Otherwise, the Fiat 500…

Well, it’s like, 1/4 of a car, really.  It has many of the things a regular car would have, except that you can hang it in your closet at night.  Or park it at a bike rack.  Fuck, if you don’t pay attention, you’d walk right on by it because you thought it was a mailbox.  I asked the guy at the rental counter how the Fiat was…he said: “It gets really good gas mileage.”  Thank God for that.  Strike one.  Sue saw it on the shelf in the garage yesterday and remarked: “Cute little Fiat!”  Cute?  Strike two.  One of the fellas at rat hockey today simply said: “What the hell?”  Strike three.

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Glazed and Infused is a homemade donut shop with 4 locations that Google can easily identify for you.  I use the one on Fulton Market.  They make delectable treats delicious enough to make you giggle like a school girl.  $30/dozen.

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The local professional ice hockey organization opens its home season 3 months late tonight at the United Airlines Center, 8 miles east of Oak Park, Illinois.  They host the St Louis Blues, winners in an overtime shootout 20 hours ago in Nashville, Tennessee.  Marian Hossa’s bringin’ it, like he can.  The Slovak is a +3 with 4 goals and an assist in his first two games back after suffering a summer of post-concussion syndrome.  Raffi Torres took him out on a criminally dangerous hit during the first round of last season’s playoffs.  Charges are still pending against Torres.

If Hossa is not your favorite Chicago Blackhawk, may God have mercy on your soul.

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